WHAT: Weighed Myself
WHEN: This Evening
WEARING: Dark blue leggings for PJ bottoms
I went to give my husband a kiss goodnight before he went to bed, but took a little detour into our bathroom to weigh myself: I’m down .5 pounds after one week! Yes! Feeling oh-so-cocky, I stopped to check myself out in the mirror: I gave myself a smile, a wink and a little wiggle of the eyebrows. Then, I decided to see just what losing .5 pounds looked like on my body.
I did a quick scan of my legs: Not bad.
Then, my butt: Hmmm… that’s peculiar. It’s all flat... Must be where I’m losing weight first...
Finally, my tummy: WHAT?!
I shouldn’t have checked myself out while wearing those dang leggings, they don't flatter anyone! What was I thinking? ... But still, how is this possible? Losing weight means stuff has to look smaller, not pop out even more! I looked like a sausage whose casing exploded in the middle! Did my butt get mad at me for eating less? Is that why it moved in with my stomach? To commiserate?
FOOTNOTE: I’m sitting on the couch eating Cheez Its right now. Self? Meet Medication. I'll jump back on the wagon after this last handful...