Monday, June 1, 2009

The Backseat Blogger

HBL is a very supportive husband. Since he’s begun to understand the concept of blogging, he is full of bloggy ideas. One day, he even said to me, “Babe, you know, if you want, I can give you a bunch of ideas for you to blog about. I’ve been coming up with a lot of them.” In fact, anytime we’re doing anything nowadays, he’ll randomly say, “Hey! You should blog about this!”

Cute, right?

Like I said, I love that my husband is supportive of my blog and my writing… but on the other hand, I don’t want or need him to tell me what to write about. That’s not how I roll. (I’m gonna sound a little ‘granola’ now) I need whatever I write about to come from an organic place. But it’s hard to say that to HBL, he wouldn’t understand and I don’t want to squelch his enthusiasm.

Last night, unfortunately, I couldn't keep my irritation with his eagerness to suggest post topics in check. My husband saw me on the computer, concentrating, while I was looking for something to write about. He sat next to me and asked what was wrong:

Me: I can’t think of anything to write about.

H: You can’t think of anything to write about?

Me: No. That’s why I’m reading everything and surfing [the internet]. I’m trying to get some inspiration.

(I continue to surf while HBL sits and thinks)

H: Well… have you talked about how Monkey is starting to walk now?

Me: No. (Surfing away)

H: (Sighs) Well? Isn’t that what your blog’s about? A Beauty Filled Life?

Me: (Exasperated) My blog?

(I pause to look at him silently for a second)

Me: It’s about everything. Whatever I feel like writing about. I don’t have to write about you and Monkey all the time.

(HBL gets up and walks off)

Now before you put my eye out for being mean to my husband, you know there is more to a conversation than just the words. There’s also the tone of voice and the looks between the lines. You have to add color to the sentences, an attitude. Here are three examples:

1. When HBL said, “You can’t think of anything to write about?”, this was what silently hung in the air afterwards: Hello?! I’ve given you sooo many topics to write about! I’m even giving you an awesome idea right now! How can you NOT have anything to write about?!

2. When he said, “Well? Isn’t that what your blog’s about? A Beauty Filled Life?”, the other silent message hanging in the air was this: “Isn’t our son walking, beautiful? Aren’t you supposed to be writing about beautiful things? Duh!

3. Do you see the part where I took a second to look at him? This was what my facial expression said to him: “Really? REALLY? You think I'm not proud of Monkey walking?! Wow, dude. That is something else. You know what? You think it's so easy, start your own blog! Ugh, I am so not in the mood to humor you right now.”

See? It’s a totally different conversation, right?

… Okay, fine. I can be a teensy bit mean to HBL…


Sharon said...

Does your husband read your blog? I know mine doesn't - unless I specifically ask him to check something out (AND I have to give him the web address!) And then when he DOES read it he'll question it. "Why do you have that post on there about XYZ?" ARRRRRRGH!

Tami said...

heh heh, I'm fortunate mine doesn't read my blog. He hates to read, he hates the computer, and most of all he hates me BEING on the computer. Now if I was close to him watching TV, that would be his dream. TV. Anything TV. I don't think you were being mean, I think you were being "expressive" *grin.

LOL. you crack me up!

Cairo Typ0 said...

I totally get it! Hubby doesn't read my blog I have a feeling if i quizzed him about the url of my blog he'd fail. *sigh*

That said, he can be supportive about it when he's not being a condescending about it.

CenzLuccsMom said...

Well, my Hubby reads my blog and let me tell you the worst is his "help" copyediting! He will say, "Oh did you know about that typo?" or "you forgot this detail." Sometimes the way I write is the way I speak and its NOT a typo!!! UGH It's style, but he doesn't get that. And he always says "well, you were an English major you should know that." I try to explain to him hat blogging is like journaling and its free form for me to do WHATEVER I want with and his suggestions, though MOSt appreciated are not really necessary. But, like HABL I know he is just excited and trying to be supportive, but really I want to tell him to get his own blog! LOL!!

Jenjen © GottaLoveMom said...

DH does not have time to read my blog although sometimes I email it to him so he can read it...but he gives me a lot of stuff to talk about- as he said at one point, "No conversation left unexploited,huh?"
Have a great week ...and hopefully it's not too hot ..

Buckeroomama said...

You crack me up. :)

Have a super week.

Mrs. Fish: aka Two Fish said...

Why do the hubs always think our blog is to bitch about them....I mean sheesh...get over themselves!


Come grab your meme since you have been tagged!!

ModernMom said...

I tell my hubby he is welcome to start his own blog. That usually shuts him up!

Veronica Lee said...

Hubby does not read my blog but he sometimes takes pics of interesting stuff he sees for my blog.

Mary K Brennan said...

They act like it's so darn easy. We're just filled with ideas, and only they can give us more. I'm not going to even tell you the idea my husband spit out last week.Let's just say I would need a Parental Guidance tab stamped next to my title.

Miss Behavin said...

That sounds so familiar. Jim does the same thing to me. Something will just pop into his head and he will say, "Hey, you should blog about this..." I know he's only trying to show support but I have to remind him that if I did write about everything he mentioned to me - then they (whoever *they* are would shut down the blogosphere!)

LZ said...

that's really cute!
I have the opposite problem. I post and then DH reads them and then has something to say about it after the fact...usually not very critical, but still makes me a bit self-conscious. I actually do sometimes ask for ideas, but he doesn't have any.

Just A Mom (Call me JAM for short) said...

Totally have had that conversation. Mine LOVES it when I write about HIM! He's always trying to do something, then he say "Hey, this would make a great blog post, maybe you should go get your camera". He's got a blog (that he doesn't use!) So I sometimes just tell him to put it on his blog, that usually will keep him quiet.

I don't think you're mean. I think your NORMAL!

Mommy24cs said...

Hubby doesn't even know I have a blog for the very reason you just described. I'm sure I will tell him about it at some point but for now I want to keep it for myself. Like my own personal diary that only my blogger friends can read because they "get it". I don't want to hear him saying "What are you writing that for?"

Deb said...

My husband didn't really read my blog, but one day decided to give a link to one of my posts on his facebook page. The only people that clicked on it were my inlaws--groan! Now I have to watch what I write...he totally blew my cover!

Alicia said... hubby does that sometimes too!! LOL

James Ricardo The Actor said...

LOL...Love reading your blog. Makes me feel close to you my friend... Does HABL ever read them? Hmmm I wonder...LOL...He is cracking me up. I hope I can look him in the eye the next time I see him...

ahappyhippy mom said...

LOL! My hubby will pretend to read what I write and then when I ask him what he thinks about what I said (something that was not even mentioned) he replies he liked it.

Two Pretty Little Skirts said...

LMBO! Jennifer our hubby's need to get together and have a beer or something. C would have said the very same thing, snarky glances and all lol.
My hubby is clueless about blogging. Once I tried to share the experience with him and he started rattling off something about myspace and facebook. (this is the point where I roll my eyes lol)

Lucy said...

I dont know what is worse your husband or mine who has only looked at my blog 3x. There has to be some middle ground:)

Stopping by from the link a thon



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